Reasons why people with Aspergers make great friends

Disclaimer-this blog post is based on my personal experiences of Aspergers Syndrome and thus will not resonate with everyone but I thought a positive blog post was needed so decided to write something on the theme of friendship. I know that the below list is not true for everyone with Aspergers because we are all different but it is true for my particular symptoms of Aspergers and those of several people with Aspergers who I have met offline.

As mentioned before in a previous blog post, Debunking The Myths, it is often assumed that people with Aspergers do not make good friends. The media has a tendency to portray us as self obsessed and boring but, in my experience, this is not the case and I am going to make several brief points as to why people with Aspergers can make great friends. 

1. A lot of people with Aspergers are incredibly loyal and stick by their friends through the good times and the bad. We genuinely appreciate the beauty of friendship because we struggle with making friends. Friendship is serious for us, not something that can be abandoned at will.

2. We may struggle with making friends but, a lot of times, we have no problem in keeping them. We may need more alone time than the average person and we will have days where we feel overwhelmed by life and may shut ourselves off from those around us but we will always come back to our friends.

3. People with Aspergers have a tendency to be honest, straight talking people. We will give you our honest opinions and help you out wherever we can. We can be trusted to always remain true to our friends.

4. A lot of people with Aspergers love deep conversations. We enjoy researching our subjects of interest and can often have expert knowledge on our chosen specialist subjects. This is NOT boring-it can open up other people’s minds to niche subjects that they have probably never even given consideration to. We are passionate about our topics of interest-I can easily pass three hours or more talking about various neurological conditions and disabilities. I personally love seeing people so passionate about a subject-this world needs more passion and enthusiasm,

5. We understand the need for alone time and personal space so will have no issue with leaving people to their own company when they desire it. We won’t press you for an explanation-we will just accept it and leave you be.

6. We see the world from a unique perspective. Accepting our friendship means you can begin to understand that perspective a little better.

7. A lot of people with Aspergers have a strong sense of justice. We like the world to be fair and will always ensure that we treat our friends the way we would like to be treated.

8. We have a tendency to keep to strict routines and arrangements. Therefore, we are unlikely to change plans at the last minute and let our friends down.

9. We tend to have a quirky sense of humour so can introduce our friends to this too.

10. We tend to have good long term memories so won’t ever forget what our friends have confided in us.

This is not, of course, to say that you have to get on with us because we have Aspergers. That would be a foolish thing to say. All I am saying is, if you meet someone with Aspergers and fancy getting to know them, don’t let the Aspergers put you off. It is only one facet of what makes our personalities so try and make that friendship work and you may be pleasantly surprised at how good we are as friends.

9 Responses to Reasons why people with Aspergers make great friends

  1. Noah Weiss says:

    This is an excellent list, and many of those apply to me. Would it be okay if I re-blog this with some modifications to my own experiences?

  2. Pingback: Message to Richard--August 2012 | Nyssa's Hobbit Hole

  3. Pingback: [M.M.X.I.V. 158] Let’s be friends | Never A Worry

  4. Thats very good steph. I would usually meet people and within 30 mins they would not like me but due to pc could not say and without knowledge of aspergers or that I had it, I wouldn’t ever see those people again.

  5. Pingback: Why I Struggle to Let Go of Richard; Also, Musings on NVLD/Asperger's | Nyssa's Hobbit Hole

  6. Thank you so much! Terrific writing, I’ll be looking for you more.

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